The right pillow can be the difference between waking up refreshed and waking up stiff. Yet many people keep the same pillow for years or choose one based on looks alone. A good pillow supports your head and neck in a comfortable position for the way you sleep. This guide explains how to choose a pillow by sleeping position, fill and firmness, and when it’s time for a new one.
Start with your sleeping position
How you sleep is the most important factor in choosing a pillow. The aim is to keep your head and neck in a comfortable, natural line with your spine.
Side sleepers
Side sleepers need the most support to fill the gap between the shoulder and the head. Look for a higher loft (thickness) and a firmer feel. A 4-inch gel memory foam pillow holds its shape through the night and has a cooling gel layer.
Back sleepers
Back sleepers usually do best with a medium loft that supports the neck without pushing the head too far forward.
Stomach sleepers
Stomach sleepers need a thin, soft pillow, or sometimes no pillow at all, to avoid bending the neck.
Combination sleepers
If you change positions during the night, a medium-loft pillow with an adjustable or shredded fill can adapt as you move.
Understanding loft and firmness
Loft is the pillow’s height. Firmness is how much it resists pressure. A high-loft pillow can be soft, and a low-loft pillow can be firm. Try to choose both based on your sleeping position and your body: broader shoulders usually need a higher loft.
Pillow fills compared
Memory foam
Molds to your head and neck and keeps its shape. Solid foam gives consistent support; shredded foam is adjustable. Gel-infused foam is designed to feel cooler.
Down and feather
Soft, light and moldable. Down is plush; feather is firmer. They need regular fluffing.
Down-alternative and polyester fiber
Soft and affordable, and a good choice for people who prefer to avoid feathers. They can flatten faster.
Latex
Springy, supportive and durable, with a bouncier feel than memory foam.
Buckwheat
Firm and adjustable, with hulls that shift to fit your shape. Some people find them noisy.
Specialty pillows
Body and pregnancy pillows
Long, curved pillows support the whole body for side sleeping and can be a comfort during pregnancy. A J-shaped pregnancy pillow cradles the head and tucks between the knees, with a soft velvet cover.
Cooling pillows
Gel layers, breathable covers and ventilated foam help hot sleepers stay comfortable.
Wedge pillows
Raise the upper body for reading or sitting up in bed.
Neck and shoulder pillows
Designed for relaxing rather than sleeping. A heated neck and shoulder massage pillow is a soothing way to unwind on the sofa after a long day. Follow the instructions and don’t sleep with heated products switched on.
Pillows for kids
Children need smaller, flatter pillows than adults, and babies should not have a pillow in the crib at all. See our guide on finding the right pillow for your child.
Caring for your pillows
- Use a pillow protector under the pillowcase to keep it clean.
- Wash pillowcases weekly.
- Wash or air pillows as the care label directs, usually every few months.
- Don’t machine-wash solid memory foam; spot-clean it and wash the removable cover instead.
- Fluff down and fiber pillows daily.
When to replace your pillow
Most pillows need replacing every one to three years. Signs it’s time include lumps, flattening, stains or smells that won’t wash out, or waking up uncomfortable. A simple test for fiber pillows: fold it in half. If it doesn’t spring back, it’s past its best.
Matching pillows to your bedding
Your pillowcases should be as comfortable as your sheets. Breathable cotton percale keeps you cool, and silky sateen feels smooth against your face. For more on fabrics, read thread count explained. For styling tips with decorative pillows and shams, see our guide to bedding layers.
How many pillows do you need?
Most people sleep with one or two pillows. Side sleepers sometimes add a pillow between the knees for comfort, and many people like an extra pillow for sitting up and reading in bed. Decorative pillows and shams are for looks and are best moved aside at night.
Pillows as gifts
A comfortable pillow makes a surprisingly welcome gift, especially for someone who has just moved home, is expecting a baby or always complains about hotel pillows. Choose a pillow with a removable, washable cover and include a gift receipt, since pillow preferences are very personal. A relaxing heated neck pillow is a lovely winter treat for anyone who spends long hours at a desk.
Trying a new pillow
A new pillow can take a few nights to get used to, especially if you’ve switched from a soft, flattened pillow to a firmer, supportive one. Give it at least a week before deciding. If possible, buy from a store with a generous return or trial policy, and keep the packaging until you’re sure. When you shop in person, lie down in your usual sleeping position and check that your neck feels comfortable and level rather than tilted up or down. Pay attention to how your shoulders feel too, since a pillow that’s too high or too low often shows up as shoulder tension first.
FAQ
What pillow is best for side sleepers?
A higher-loft, firmer pillow that fills the space between your shoulder and head.
How often should I wash my pillows?
Pillowcases weekly, and the pillows themselves every few months, following the care label.
Is memory foam better than down?
It depends on preference. Memory foam gives consistent support; down is softer and more moldable.
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